A TRIP TO THE SUPERMARKET WITH CHILDREN

A TRIP TO THE SUPERMARKET WITH CHILDREN - A SNAPSHOT #1
1. Arrive at the supermarket , ready to do your weekly shop, happy in the knowledge that your fridge will soon be full and that your family will want for nothing.
2. Collect your trolley, explain to the children that they are not old enough to push it but they can help.
3. Tire of the children clambering all over / dangling off the trolley. 
4. Allow them to push the trolley on the proviso that they are sensible and don't mess about.
5. Apologise to the elderly person they just rammed the trolley into whilst messing about. 
6. Realise that you have already been there 10 minutes and the only thing in your trolley is a bag of bananas. 
7. Try to occupy the children by making them do jobs, like sourcing some fruit. 
8. Take most of the fruit back that they sourced as they have chosen the most expensive, organic, fed by miracle spring water from the most remote mountain in Peru type fruit.
9. Bump into some school friends (of the children). 
10. Try to stop the (now gang) of children running up and down all the aisles like something out of Lord of The Flies.
11. Threaten to 'Go Home At Once', but realise this is cutting your nose off to spite your face as you in fact have no food at home. 
12. Realise the only thing in your trolley is bananas and apples. 
13. Lose the children. Panic, race up and down the aisles to find the children at the bakery section having helped them selves to gingerbread men and trying to print off multiple labels from the machine. 
14. Lose the will to live. 
15. Tell the children they can go and look at the toys, you will meet them there.
16. Speed shop chucking random things into your trolley. 
17. Arrive at the toy aisle to be faced with requests to purchase very expensive toys. 
18. Manage to negotiate away from expensive toy and settle on some over-priced piece of ‘essential’ plastic tat. 
19. Pay, leave, let the children who now allege they are about to starve to death eat something that generates the most known crumbs to man in the car. 
20. Arrive home, unpack, realise that despite having two bags full of food, you will still struggle to rustle up a meal with all the food you have purchased. 
21. Pour an exceedingly large glass of wine.